I want to ask about what type of relationship that is permissible between males and females in high schools, such as girlfriends/boyfriends. Also, I heard about `urfi marriage, and I met a girl, and the college is not close to my parents. So if I can't communicate with my parents or the girl can't, or even some of them may lost their parents and can't communicate to them. Is that halal or not? I am asking because it is really hard here to be in a high school then in sha' Allah in college with all the girls basically surrounding you. I want a solution to help me so as not to fall in Zina.
In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.
All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.
According to the advice of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him), you are supposed to try your best to get married; if you can’t do this, then observing fasting is a protection or a shield from evil.
I don’t know what you exactly mean by `urfi marriage. If you mean the Islamic marriage with all its conditions and prerequisites but not registered in the American court, it is Islamically correct. You can contact the girl and bring her to the Mosque and have your Islamic marriage performed there. The Imam should be able to assist you with the requirements and conditions.
But if you mean by `urfi marriage to marry the girl without the consent of her Muslim parents, this is not acceptable as the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) is reported to have said: “There is no (young) woman who got married without the consent of her guardian except that the marriage will be invalid.”
Having said this, I advise you to stay away from temptations including unnecessary interaction and contact with the girls at your high school and beyond.